Parsee Mizuhashi (
bridge_princess) wrote2016-09-11 02:23 pm
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Memories (CW in the last two memories, listed in headers)
Five memories are included below.
Content Warnings for the last two are significant, and deal with the plight of of people in adverse circumstances in the ancient world, some pretty heavy handed misoginy, suicide ideation and ritual suicide (with implications of both several unpleasant methods to die.). So, I cannot stress this enough:
DO NOT READ THE LAST TWO LINKS IF YOU ARE NOT COMFORTABLE DOING SO.
I'm going to post links to each memory here for convenience, so that you only have to read the ones that you want to. The first two are silly dumb shit that happens in Touhou all the time. They leave implied the horrible, darkness that is Japanese folklore of the youkai and other such creatures, and instead turn it into a goofy, silly world where young women with magical powers kick each other's asses because it's apparently just how they solve each other's problems. There's links to game footage and it's all very silly. You're not going to run into trigger warnings there.
The third link has some emotional trauma and severe loneliness in it, and is derived from the setting and implications of her game material and Marisa's accounts about her, along with several well known doujinshi which give the usual headcanon of most fans about her relationship with Yuugi. It's not awful, but be aware it's going to sound pretty lonely.
The last two are just what I warned about. Part of the reason multiple methods of death are included is that the ancient myth implies drowning and Touhou Project leans heavily on the myth. However, Parsee is drawn very specifically with a garment that covers her forearms, regardless of the illogical nature of it, tied off at her elbows and wrists. She is seen in official art with it regularly and in most fanart, without explanation. She does not allow people to see her forearms, implying a second method was likely used to 'make sure she died' the last night of the ritual.
The Memories:
Subterranean Animism: Her main canon appearance. Silly stuff
Hopeless Masquerade: She appears as the audience, watching still more silly stuff (Marisa v Koishi)
A Day in the Life: CW Severe Loneliness and Depression
The Darker Memories:
Gaining the Ritual of the Hashihime: CW: Suicide Ideation, Misogynistic Society, Divorce, Curses, Cursed Dolls, Homicidal Urges, Black Magic
The Ritual: CW - Ritual Suicide (Implied Slitting Wrists, Bleeding Out, Drowning, Death by Exposure, Starvation and Thirst), Undead Resurrection, Homicidal Intent
Content Warnings for the last two are significant, and deal with the plight of of people in adverse circumstances in the ancient world, some pretty heavy handed misoginy, suicide ideation and ritual suicide (with implications of both several unpleasant methods to die.). So, I cannot stress this enough:
DO NOT READ THE LAST TWO LINKS IF YOU ARE NOT COMFORTABLE DOING SO.
I'm going to post links to each memory here for convenience, so that you only have to read the ones that you want to. The first two are silly dumb shit that happens in Touhou all the time. They leave implied the horrible, darkness that is Japanese folklore of the youkai and other such creatures, and instead turn it into a goofy, silly world where young women with magical powers kick each other's asses because it's apparently just how they solve each other's problems. There's links to game footage and it's all very silly. You're not going to run into trigger warnings there.
The third link has some emotional trauma and severe loneliness in it, and is derived from the setting and implications of her game material and Marisa's accounts about her, along with several well known doujinshi which give the usual headcanon of most fans about her relationship with Yuugi. It's not awful, but be aware it's going to sound pretty lonely.
The last two are just what I warned about. Part of the reason multiple methods of death are included is that the ancient myth implies drowning and Touhou Project leans heavily on the myth. However, Parsee is drawn very specifically with a garment that covers her forearms, regardless of the illogical nature of it, tied off at her elbows and wrists. She is seen in official art with it regularly and in most fanart, without explanation. She does not allow people to see her forearms, implying a second method was likely used to 'make sure she died' the last night of the ritual.
The Memories:
Subterranean Animism: Her main canon appearance. Silly stuff
Hopeless Masquerade: She appears as the audience, watching still more silly stuff (Marisa v Koishi)
A Day in the Life: CW Severe Loneliness and Depression
The Darker Memories:
Gaining the Ritual of the Hashihime: CW: Suicide Ideation, Misogynistic Society, Divorce, Curses, Cursed Dolls, Homicidal Urges, Black Magic
The Ritual: CW - Ritual Suicide (Implied Slitting Wrists, Bleeding Out, Drowning, Death by Exposure, Starvation and Thirst), Undead Resurrection, Homicidal Intent
Hopeless Masquerade
You remember yourself standing in the midst of an old, columned palace. It isn't a place that you usually visit. This is the home of that three eyed monster who reads people's minds and runs all of old hell. You have the good, god-damned sense not to show up here, and yet for whatever reason something seems to be going on and everyone who's anyone in this rotten little cesspool of a town's shown up to watch what... yep. It's another fight. Because of course it is.
Someone's whining nearby about the pessimism and the malaise that seems to have overtaken Gensokyo above and Hell as well. You haven't noticed, but then again your world is usually saturated with a certain malaise. But when you see the blonde girl floating in on her broom, looking for trouble again, you can't help but bite your thumb in irritation and jealousy. Marisa. Always so high and mighty. And now she's flown in here shouting about how she's going to be a 'missionary' of some sort, as if that girl ever had a religious bone in her thieving body. "Tch," you mutter. "Nerve of that one. Got guts, doesn't she?" She's not even looking at you over in your corner. Nobody is. Like always.
You don't... really remember the other girl that she runs into. It's like you should know her, but you've never seen her before in your life, or you can't remember it, and it kind of irritates you. She just sort of giggles and appears in the middle of the fight, taking advantage of a cheap shot, and that's the moment anyone even sees her. The only one not really surprised is the old satori who's in charge. There's magic spells, potions and beams flying everywhere, and out of nowhere vines, hearts and rose petals in all directions! You have to dodge out of the way just to keep from getting hit as they wage war. It all feels so painfully normal to you, the way random strangers just start going at it.
When the fight is done, the green haired girl's just giggling and everyone else seems to be fascinated by Marisa's gifts. AGAIN. You honestly don't see what they see in that brat, and it makes you seethe with jealousy, but it's obvious everyone is paying attention to her, not the malaise from before. She's trying to figure out why the other girl was even involved. Something something about not being remembered... ? Whatever, they're leaving. Maybe you can get some peace finally.
Distantly you remember overhearing later that it was some demented popularity contest between the more well known figures to try and take people's minds off the malaise and get to the bottom of things. Like usual... everything involved kicking someone's ass, because that was apparently just how things were done in Gensokyo.
... at least you didn't get your ass kicked this time. You're counting that as a victory.
Subterranean Animism
It was another day on a bridge nobody used. The youkai were busy most of the time and didn't bother coming this close to the human world. Yuugi was out drunk and patrolling the streets. You weren't expecting to see anyone at all. Even that irritating earth spider girl hadn't been by to bother you today.
That was when she appeared. A girl in red and whites of a shrine maiden. Probably from one of the two shrines up top in the human world. You could feel another presence with her, a familiar one, an old one. She wasn't alone, though she was the only one bodily there. "Are you a human? What would you want in the former capitol? Are you here for our cursed powers?"
The dark haired girl scoffed at that. She had her own power naturally and you could feel the envy seething in you a little. Naturally she wouldn't pay any attention to someone like you. Right about then, you heard a voice asking if you were the bridge princess, coming out of her lips. Old. Familiar. That damned drunk from the mountain, one of Yuugi's old friends. Suika. Always talking down to you, always looking on you like a small fry. You could barely hear what they were saying at this point.
"Are you looking down on me?!?" you shriek. The girl looks confused and kind of irritated. She's trying to talk to herself, to get Suika to stop provoking you, but it's a little late. "Feel the power of a youkai of fear who should have been sealed away!" After all, that's what they should have done with you. That's what you thought they had done here. Humans didn't belong here. You'd remind Suika not to treat you like shit like she always did.
The fringes of green were in your eyes. It was really hard to think straight. All you could see were the constant differences between you two. Every time Reimu cast a spell, it was more powerful than you were and you hated it, hurling balls of green light, the ashes of the dead and sakura blossoms everywhere. Where the green light touched, you could see her fighting with the urge to succumb to the same bitterness. But she was always stronger willed. Her spells were homing in on you, and every time they hit they hurt like hell. You split into doubles to make her pick the wrong target but of course she always seemed to know!
It was over almost before it began. You were panting on the side of the bridge, waiting for the shrine maiden to purify and finish you off, but she was ignoring you. "Damn... you," you were muttering as she was shouting at Suika to stop holding conversations through her because it wasn't helping. They trailed off, and Reimu was right. It definitely wasn't helping. A few minutes later, you could hear a drunken Yuugi laughing uproariously.
"Ngh... kick... her... ass, you drunk." You had no idea what this shit was all about. Nobody ever did.
A Day in the Life of a Jealous Girl
Maybe Yukari'd had a point. It was time for all of you to go away. Somewhere safe. Safe for you. Safe for them. Sealed by the Barrier.
So, here you were, on a bridge. They'd had the decency to make it look like the one in your hometown. A little bit of home, like Uji, one had said. You'd almost appreciated the gesture, but now nobody came. The bridge was meaningless after all. Nobody had business in hell from above. souls were going to the New Hell the Yama had made. The youkai were already down here and Yukari'd said they weren't supposed to go upstairs really. Everyone obeyed her, because she was scary as fucking hell. So now, the only time anyone ever came by was if Yuugi was drunk and bored, or that spider decided to visit.
You watched from behind your shrine. The youkai were all having fun. There was that bucket girl. That blasted bucket. All she could do was drop down and scare people before she tied to eat them. What was so god-damned special about her? But people were talking to her, chatting away. Random phantoms that hadn't left and youkai were drinking, partying and chatting in the markets, and they were ignoring you. Avoiding you, distancing themselves.
Every day it got worse. You wanted to talk to them, but why would they want to talk to you? None of them were breaking up, after all. They were all so god-damned fucking happy all the time. It made your blood boil, green lights starting to spill out, as youkai began to notice and just sort of edged away from the bridge. Nobody ever came to the bridge...
Right up until a hand slapped you on the shoulder. It sent you sprawling and you heard a laugh. Yuugi was laughing down at you, grabbing you by the scruff of your neck and hauling you up. You could smell the booze on her lips. But it wasn't like other people getting drunk. You didn't want sober oni. They got mad. Drunk, she didn't give two shits how jealous you made her. She ruffled your hair and laughed. "You're being a pill again. Stop paying attention to them. Sit, have a drink."
"you're not going to take no for an answer are you?" You can already see it in the way she's grinning. "Fine. Whatever. It'll get you out of my hair."
You're grateful. You might be jealous of her, but you're not alone for a moment...
HOW DARE HE?!? (CW: Suicide Ideation, Horribly Misogynistic Old World Realties, Black Magic/Curses)
"You think you can just LEAVE ME HERE?!?" you scream. The pain is overwhelming. You'd given your youth to him. You'd given him your body. You were going to bear his children, manage his house, entertain the lord's guests as he tried to rise in prominence in the courts. You had dedicated your life to him and the negotiations had been perfect, fine. He'd agreed. his family had agreed. Your family had agreed.
"CHANGE UP?!? You think you can just DO THAT YOU SON OF A BITCH?!?" It's coming out in waves. You're nauseous, sick to your stomach. You could have forgiven him for an affair. People HAD those. If he'd wanted to screw that little chit he thought was prettier than you, yeah you would have been jealous, but you could have dealt with it like every other god-damned noble house on the planet. You'd have sucked it up and kept the family running, but no. He'd divorced you! For a younger woman, and you weren't even fucking old!!!
Your hands shook as you picked up a white doll. Nobody came to this shrine. Kifune's shrine was forgotten by too many. They hadn't heard you the last six nights you'd done this, and they weren't going to hear you tonight. There was a white doll in your hands, a hammer and a nail in the other. "What am I supposed to do with my life now? Huh? You think there's work for me? You piece of shit, I'll show you. I'll show all of you, laughing behind my back..."
The hammer drove in. Every time it did, the doll sunk in deeper and you could feel your rage bleeding into it. You were laughing, crying, giggling. Seven days, they said. The kami would have to hear you. And every time you pounded, it felt good.
That was when you felt the kami's presence. You could hear it, whispering to you. You were dedicated. You could do this. You'd have to die, but you could get your revenge.
"It's fine. He might as well have killed me already. I'll do whatever it takes. Turn me into a demon. I don't care anymore. He's going to PAY."
Hashihime (CW: Ritual Suicide. Implied Double Homicide in Near Future)
The spirit had told you to dress in robes of white, as if for your own funeral, robed in the color of death, your face painted red. Your unusual, exotic blonde hair short-cut in mourning, you carried a pair of candles on iron holders between your teeth, a crown of iron with three such candles on your head. You was beneath the great bridge of Uji. Nobody would care. Your family had surely disowned you by now, because obviously this was your fault or it wouldn't have happened. Or at least, that was how you were thinking of it.
The last night, you were going to make sure you didn't rise from the waters until it was done. The knife would make sure of that. You knew how. You wouldn't take chances. The blood would wash away, and when it was done, when the mortal body was dead, be it from exposure of night after night, exhaustion, starvation, thirst, drowning or blood lose it would be done. You would rise into this world a demon.
Your pulse was starting to dim. It was all getting a sort of bloody fringe at the edge of your vision. It hurt and you were cold, but you didn't care. Even if the ritual failed, you didn't care. Maybe that bastard would find out still what you'd tried to do. You just wanted him to suffer the way he'd made you suffer. When your head slipped under, you could feel the burn in your lungs, the pain in your arms and then... nothing.
You didn't like how long it was. Oblivion was like that. Death was like that. You stopped feeling anything, and then an eternity passed, or perhaps only a moment. You rose from the water. your skin was pale and the candles were still lit. You could feel the jealousy seething in you, hot like lava. It burned with the embers of the candles and your eyes glowed. You grinned, tears flowing down your face as you looked into the water. You'd done it. You looked beautiful... perfectly arrayed for the moment. This was what you were meant for.
It was time for him to die. Screaming.